Ken Hussar is a long-time Phillies fan, retired teacher and someone who writes offbeat humor, professionally and as an amateur. He e-mailed the following, which I thought was worthy of sharing with other Phillies fans. One of his disclaimers: “Use only in well-ventilated areas.”
THE PH PHACTOR
Phrom Ken Hussar
Phew! Phinallie, Phreezing Phillies Phans Phrollic on Broad Street,
These Phillies phanned the phlames of victory, what a phantastic pheat!
Super-closer Brad Lidge, phinished it all in phlawless phashion,
Phreeing the demons of seasons past,
Unleashing phrenzied passion.
Phantastic, phenomenal, and now phorever phrozen in time,
We, the phans, are phloating on air with a pheeling so sublime.
Pat Gillick and Ed Wade phormed this phormidable phorce,
And skipper Charlie Manuel steered the ship, keeping it on course.
This pheisty, phabulous phraternity is phirst in our hearts,
and Philly’s pheeling phine,
The World Series Championship phlag will now phly over
the Citizens Bank Park’s skyline.
It’s time to phorget phrustrations, seasons of suphering,
and the phickle phinger of phate,
And to phocus on this wonderful team that makes we Phillies phans pheel great.
Ryan, Chase, J-Roll, Pedro, Carlos (the killer zees) and Chris Coste.
Jayson, oh so werthy, the Phlyin’ Hawaiian, Pat the Bat,
to you we raise a toast.
King Cole, Kyle, Jamie, Brett, and Joe, phashioned brilliant starts,
And the relieph that Brad, Chad, Ryan, Scott and J.C. delivered was truly off-the-charts!
Bruntlett, Jenkins, Taguchi, Stairs and Dobbs,
Phlexed their bench muscles and phlourished in their jobs.
This team phound the phenomenal phormula phor a winning philosophy,
Euphoria is a phitting pheeling for this Phillies Phamily!